


Toys and blushes

by justme (silver_spring)



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M, I never write but here we are, JB Appreciation week 2016, hopefully I'm doing this right, this doesn't fit with any of the themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-25
Updated: 2016-09-25
Packaged: 2018-08-17 07:34:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8135677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silver_spring/pseuds/justme
Summary: Brienne is tasked with getting equipment for a party..and it's not exactly stuff she could get at party city.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ikkiM](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ikkiM/gifts).



> I have no excuses for this other than that it is the result of last night's JB week chat and an idea I had. The last time I've written anything..well, let's just say it's been years and not even in this language. All of this is my way of asking you to be extra gentle ;)  
> I'd like to dedicate this in all it's unbetaed imperfection to the lovely ikkiM because she is awesome and her love and enthusiasm for all things JB is simply inspiring :)

Brienne grabbed the car door handle once more... and paused. Nope, it wasn't happening. The third time wasn't the charm here. She pulled her fingers back and took a deep breath to steel herself for the next attempt, her eyes flickering once more to the brick building across the street and the sign reading _Close The Door_. She had to do this; Margaery's bachelorette party was already tomorrow night, there was no more time to order from trident.wes or come up with another solution.

If she hadn't known better, she would've thought that sending her on this particular errand was Margaery's way of getting back at her for declining to be a bridesmaid, but that wasn't her friend's style. If Marge had wanted to get back at her, it would've been a lot more subtle than this. No, she had pouted and tried to change her mind for at least three weeks, but in the end Margaery had, albeit grudgingly, respected Brienne's wish not to be forced into wearing a gown and be gawked at by every guest, the septon and pretty much anyone that just happened to glimpse her on the day. Her height alone guaranteed she'd be stared at enough already without a tea pink dress that wouldn't look good on her broad shoulders and thick waist no matter how well made to measure it was, and fading into the background would perhaps spare her some at least of the whispers and funny glances. Eventually, her actual bridesmaid job had gone to one of Marge's cousins. However, since she would be flying in from Highgarden only a few days before the ceremony and since Brienne did feel a little bit bad for declining, she had offered to help with wedding preparations and whatever Ellinor would be doing were she here until she arrived. So, she had sat through more than one bridal gown fitting, tried, what it felt like, ten thousand different cakes and tried to give some input about table decorations, not that she understood much about that. And now this.

Last night Margaery had called, asking her to get some things for the bachelorette party since Sansa, who was originally in charge of it, unexpectedly had come down with a nasty stomach bug. _Just a few items, won't take long_ Marge had said, and Brienne of course had accepted. Then, about two hours ago, Sansa had finally texted her the list, addresses where to get what best included, and for the last 15 minutes Brienne had been sitting in her car, staring across the street onto a red door, trying to work up the courage to actually walk through it. Everything else on the list had been easily found and bought; this was her last stop. A tiny part of her was still hoping for a text that would tell her it was a joke, but Sansa took her duties as maid of honor very seriously and so it wasn't likely that text would ever come.

"There's nothing to it; you are an adult!", she tried to give herself another pep talk. "If Sansa could do it, you can too. Sansa is way more girly and delicate than you! Get a grip, Tarth, and get it over with! This is your duty, now do it!"

For the fourth time, Brienne grabbed the door handle, this time quickly pulling it before she could herself talk out of it again. Crossing the street, she kept her eyes locked on the red door.

"Seven help me", she muttered before entering the adult store.

*

It was...so not what she had expected. Then again, Brienne had never before set a foot into a sex shop, so what did she know anyway? She had imagined dimmed lights, cramped aisles with neon signs pointing towards sleazy movies, beaded curtains leading only the Gods knew where and a general air of seediness, but _Close The Door_ seemed..nice, almost. It was bright and spacious, there were no lewd dvd covers or posters of naked people in more or less uncomfortable looking positions, no bow-chicka-bow-bow music droning from tinny sounding speakers. That was a relief, if only a short-lived one. There was still the actual shopping to be done, after all. Fishing her phone out of her jeans pocket, Brienne opened the list once more, scrolling down to the item on it she had so far done her best to overlook.

"Hello, do you need any assistance?", a deep voice behind her asked.

Brienne whirled around, eyes wide. Now in front of her, the probably most gorgeous man she'd ever seen outside of tv, was looking at her with a expectant half smile. He was almost as tall as she was, muscular but not beefy, with tousled gold blonde hair, emerald green eyes and what Margaery would call sexy stubble. _Figures_ , she thought. _Of course the Gods send a sales clerk that could be one of their own to help the ugly, awkward customer. They seem to really like to rub it in._

"I...uh...I...", she stammered and broke off.

"Or are you just browsing until something tickles your fancy?", handsome guy continued, showing perfect teeth.

"I...no, I have..I need.." _Deep breaths, deep breaths, don't make it even more awkward, the man is a professional.._

"Vibrator.", she pressed out, already feeling her cheeks gearing up for a massive blush. The sales clerk looked at her for a long moment, tilting his head a little sideways, before nodding.

"Alright, miss. This way, please. By the way, my name is Jaime."

He led her over to the back of the shop, where a whole wall seemed to be dedicated to the particular toys she was supposed to buy. Boxes in all colors, advertising this or that special feature shelved from floor almost to the ceiling. It was too much to take in.

"Oh Gods, this is going to be worse than finding the right vaccuum cleaner bags!", she muttered.

Jaime, standing next to her, chuckled.

"But I daresay it will be more fun after the purchase. So, what are we looking for?"

"I have no idea."

"Well, we have everything in stock: Bullets, traditional vibes, g-spot vibes, clitoral stimu--"

"Okay! I get the idea. Uh..which one..which one sells the best?"

"Hmm..the most well known brand would be the _Direwolf_ , but trust me, you don't want that. It is quite durable, but it's got only three settings and a rather laughable pulsation. They still sell quite well because the brand name is known and many folks buy online rather than seeking customer consultation or grab the first thing they recognize when they visit a toy store, but long term it'll go downhill for that company."

Grabbing the first item and be done..now that was an idea. Too bad she hadn't thought of it. Now she was here, getting one-on-one customer consultation and might as well listen to what the sales professional had to say. She surely didn't want to be responsible if one of the other girls wanted to actually try out their _vibe_ and something went wrong.

"Right, no _Direwolf_ then. Uh..how about this one?"

Brienne pointed to a medium sized box in muted colors, advertising something called _'The Tickler'_ which seemed to be on clearance. Jaime shook his head, making a _tss_ noise.

"There's a reason that one is going out of stock. It's like with tattoos, you know? A good vibrator isn't cheap and a cheap vibrator in 9 out of 10 cases isn't good."

"If you want to get rid of these, shouldn't you try to make someone buy them instead of talking them out of it?"

"That would hardly be good customer service now, would it? Besides, I don't judge. Some people like it cheap. If someone comes in, asking for The Tickler specifically I'll gladly sell it to them."

"So you don't get a cut when you sell the more expensive stuff?"

Not that the price was the deciding factor here. Sansa had already promised to reimburse her for everything she'd had to buy today.

"I get a cut of everything that goes over our counter. I'm actually the co-owner of Close The Door."

"Really? How..I mean, not to be nosy, but how did that come to be?"

"It's alright. Well, to be honest, when my brother and I decided not to join the family company and start our own business, we pretty much went for the venture that we thought would piss off our father the most."

"And did it?"

"Seeing as he hasn't spoken to either of us for the last two years, I'd say we've been successful. Enjoying blissful silence and making our own money."

Brienne didn't quite understand why someone would be happy about the fact that their parents were not on speaking terms with them, but he seemed fine with it.

"Congratulations."

"Thank you. But enough about me, let's get back to making you a happy customer. How about...let's see..this one?"

Jaime stepped to the end of the shelf, picking up a red box and presented it to her with a flourish.

"This is _The Red Viper_ , a g-spot vibrator. It's got remote control, thirty different settings, a rotating tip.."

"Uh..I don't think so. It sounds..too much."

"..and the pulsation is quite something. Here."

Before she could protest, Jaime went back to the place he'd gotten the box from and picked up a test model. A soft hum filled the air around them when he switched The Red Viper on.

"Take it."

"What?!", Brienne screeched and then quickly looked around if anyone had taken notice. There was only one other customer as far as she could see though and he seemed to be engrossed in examining something that looked like.. _a foot_?

"Look, I can talk to you all day long about what a vibe can do, but what better way to help you find out if it's the right one for you than to feel it out for yourself? Give me your hand."

"I'm good, really", she replied, wanting to take a step backwards, and being prevented to do so by the wall of vibrators. Jaime lifted his eyebrows for a moment, but other than that didn't have any reaction. He just held her glance as soon as he caught it, staring deeply into her eyes. Which, and it was the oddest feeling, calmed her at the same time as it made her want to run away.

"What's your name?"

"Brienne."

"Trust me, Brienne. Nothing here bites."

Holding her gaze, he reached out with his left hand and took a hold of her right. He tilted his head in an _okay?_ fashion and Brienne inexplicably found herself nodding. The next thing she knew was that the _Red Viper_ was merrily humming in her hand. Her eyes widened.

"Wow, this is..intense."

Jaime gave her a lazy grin.

"I know, right? And this is only medium setting."

"Yeah, no.. that's..that's too much. Take it back. Here!"

She thrust her hand with the vibrator towards him, wanting to get rid of it and it fell onto the hardwood floor, where it began turning in a slow circle.

"Oh Gods, I'm sorry!", Brienne shrieked, crouching down out of reflex, even though the last thing she wanted was to touch that red devil again. Her cheeks would already never return to a normal color again, she was sure of it.

"It's okay, no worries", Jaime said calmly, crouching down himself and picking the damn thing up again, finally switching it off.

"These things are pretty durable", he said with a wink. Once more, Brienne's eyes got caught in his gaze. He was close enough now for her to realize that he had little flecks of gold in the emerald green of his irises.

"Excuse me? Anyone? Can I get some service here?", a booming voice from the front rang throughout the store, breaking the moment. Jaime cleared his throat and looked away.

"I'll be right back", he muttered.

He went to the counter where the other customer, a man with long red hair and beard, had apparently decided on which foot shaped gods-know-what to buy. Brienne shook her head in order to clear it. What had that been? _Get a grip, Tarth_ , she told herself not for the first time today. _He's just being a friendly salesman, he invested time and wants to make some profit. Look at him, look at yourself and get back to reality!_

Standing up, she faced the wall of vibrators like she was assessing an opponent. She was going to use Jaime's absence to pick the first one that caught her eye and be done with this. Was it really important what these things could do? She so wasn't planning on taking hers even out of the box it came in and if any of the other girls at the party didn't like what she brought back from this excursion, well, not her problem. She just wanted to get out of this shop as fast as possible. Away from the thrumming and the humming and the good smelling sales clerk with the hypnotic eyes. Grabbing a rainbow colored box, she turned to go. And almost walked straight into Jaime.

"Whoa, where's the fire?"

"I'll take this one", Brienne said quite brusquely, holding the box up. Jaime took a quick look.

"Excellent choice. _The Oathkeeper_. Because the company vows it can get anyone off."

"Aha. I'd like six of them, please."

"Six? Wow, I have to say I did not expect that turn of events."

"They're not for me! They're for a bachelorette party!"

"Of course", Jaime nodded, and for the first time since she'd met him sounded less than enthusiastic. Or was it that he didn't believe her?

"Why would I need six vibrators?!"

He shrugged, taking the box out of her hands and walking swiftly back towards the counter, Brienne following him.

"Variety? I don't know, you tell me."

"Well, I don't. My friend is getting married and I have to pick up the..party favors.. for the bachelorette party."

"Oh", Jaime said, sounding surprised and looking up. "Well...sounds like it's going to be some party."

"I fear the worst."

That made him chuckle again.

"It can't be worse than me being an idiot just now", he muttered.

Before Brienne could even think about asking what that meant exactly, he continued. "Wait here, I'll get the other ones from storage. Be right back."

While he was away, a couple entered the shop, chatting animatedly and heading straight for the movie section. They seemed completely at ease with being here. Sometimes Brienne really wondered how everyone else did it, to be so..relaxed. The woman, a redhead, loudly announced that her partner was going to get an education today since he knew nothing.

"It's your lucky day", Jaime proclaimed upon his return. Brienne turned back to the counter.

"I really don't think so."

"We have 20% off on water based lubes this week."

"They can get their own damn lube."

"Oookay.. that'll be 240, then"

Brienne got out her wallet while Jaime packed her purchase into a giant, non-descriptive brown paper bag. He waited patiently while she counted out the dragon bills before handing her the bag.

"Here you go! Have fun at your party and please do come again."

"Yeah, sure", she replied, knowing she would never want to set a foot into this shop or any other like it again. Grabbing her bag, she turned to go.

"Thank you for your help."

"You're very welcome. Uh.."

Whatever he might've wanted to say was left unspoken as the couple she'd seen two minutes or so ago walked up to the cash register, a stack of dvd cases in the grinning girl's hands.

*

Stepping outside, the first thing Brienne did was to take a deep breath. And then another. Her cheeks still felt flaming hot and would probably stay that way for quite some time. Well, this had been highly embarrassing in total, but she'd gotten it done and over with eventually which, in an odd way, made her slightly proud of herself. When she got to her car, she popped the trunk to put the bag in. And let it stay there until it was time to hand it over to Sansa.

"Hey! Hey, Brienne! Wait!"

Turning around, she saw Jaime running across the street towards her. Brienne began to pat down her pants. Had she forgotten her wallet in the shop or something? No, her wallet was in her back pocket. Now what?

"Is something wrong?", she asked when Jaime had made it over to her. "Do I owe you more money or..?"

"No, no, nothing like that. I..uh..I was wondering if you'd like to get coffee some time? With me? Obviously."

"Why?", she asked flabbergastedly.

"Why not?", he replied, giving her a crooked smile.

"Well, for one, I know how I look and you--"

"I like the way you blush. And, not to sound like a total cliche, but.. you have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. Please? I promise I'll leave all sex talk at home."

Once more he winked and unfolded the full power of his gaze on her, this time even coupled with a bite of his bottom lip. And no other customers to distract them. It was almost unfair, she had practically no other choice than..

"Okay."

**Author's Note:**

> yeah, so that was in my brain and needed to get out..I'll let you get back to your JB week enjoyment now. Thank you for reading!


End file.
